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Category Archives: Gambling Opinion

Rant Against All The Casino-Haters

So I’m pretty fed up with all the vitriol and hate that comes from the majority of Toronto casino opponents, in the debate about whether to let a casino operate within Toronto city limits. To sum up the current state of affairs, for the past year or so, there’s been a lot of discussion about the Ontario Lottery and Gaming Corporation allowing a casino within Toronto. Currently the only slots within Toronto city limits are at the Woodbine Racetrack (really at the north-west outskirts of the city, near Pearson Airport). There are no table games at Woodbine, and while its fun to visit and also bet on the ponies, it ain’t no casino. It’s also really out of the way for most Torontonians.

Current Mayor-Buffoon Rob Ford has been mounting a campaign to attract this casino, and possible “hosting” money from the OLG (and province). The hosting money might be falling through (as of the latest press cycle), but the interest from international gambling and resort companies like Harrah’s and Ceasar’s is still real. They’ve been proposing some pretty interesting ideas, and those, like me, who enjoy going to a casino from time to time, have been fairly interested in having a world-class gambling and entertainment venue available in our modern, world-class city.

However, this idea has REALLY brought the hate on from a vocal cross-section of the city, that includes quite a number of high profile left-leaning intellectuals, as well as a large contingent of NIMBY (Not In My BackYard) social conservatives. While this is to be expected, the level of discourse about the topic has become really, really base and stupid. I’m talking about forums such as the Toronto Star comments sections, community newspaper opinion pages, and local blogs like blogTO.com.

What I see is a lot of hate and misunderstanding from self-righteous blowhards who have clearly never, ever, set foot inside a state-sanctioned Canadian casino. What these commenters rail about are ideas that are informed by late-90’s Hollywood-movie caricatures of casinos, as mafia-run dens of vice. They’re talking about hookers, druggies, murderers, thugs and grifters. It’s like they are imagining the horrific, alternate-timeline casino that Biff controlled in the Back to the Future movies.

And that’s just not the truth. The truth is… OLG Casinos are really, actually, quite nice.

What you’ll find inside the big OLG Casinos in Ontario (such as Niagara Fallsview, or Casino Rama) are a bunch of seniors and retirees, and large numbers of well-heeled Asians looking to blow off some steam. Sure, some of these people seem lost and desperate and some may be problem gamblers, but the vast majority of them are just out for a convenient, easy place to have a some unstructured entertainment and social interaction. Attached to these casinos are really nice entertainment venues where B-list performers (and A-list acts from yester-year) provide low-cost, quality entertainment (The B-52s double-billed with The Bangles? Gypsy Kings? Russell Peters, anyone?). And if you sign up for the loyalty card, and gamble a nominal amount, often these are are absolutely FREE. They’ll often toss in a free buffet once a month. If you have the willpower to control your gambling, that’s a free day of entertainment, son!

On Fridays and Saturday nights, you’ll see a few groups of younger dudes on the prowl, and “Girls Night Out” ladies, before they pile into limos and taxis to the clubs, but most other times, it’s the demographic I describe above. Like the friendly middle-aged dudes and ladies who congregate around the poker tables at the Thousand Islands Charity Casino, near Kingston. The dealer knows all of them, and they all know each other, and they never let hands get “out of hand” unless a flush-looking out-of-town fish like me sits down with a couple hundred bucks. And even when they slyly take your money away from you over the course of an evening, they give you a good time doing it, regaling you with stories and “tips” galore.

Are we taking advantage of seniors with safe, state-sanctioned, smoke-free gambling establishments? Well yes, but they are happy to be taxed in this way. It can be fun, and social, to be in a nice, new, updated casino, with fancy washrooms and well-run restaurants. Why shouldn’t old people have fun? Why shouldn’t they have a place to go that doesn’t make them feel old, or uncool?

For that matter, why can’t I go? Sometimes I don’t feel like going to the swankiest new restaurant in-town, to drop 200 bucks on locally-sourced dinner and wine. Sometimes I can’t be bothered to go to some loud, obnoxious club on Richmond Street, or force myself into some dimly lit College Street venue to listen to the latest hipster band. Sometimes I’d rather drive to a casino, with ample parking, a variety of dining and shopping options, and have the ability to dip into some slots or some poker for an hour, or two, or three, and come home a little lighter in the wallet but happier in the head.

Haven’t tried it? Why not, scaredy-cat? Maybe you’ll still find it’s not your cup of tea, but you might also realize it shouldn’t be up to you to deny this right to other people who do enjoy this kind of thing – responsible, consenting adults, out for the a good time that they know from experience is really rather innocuous and pleasant for them.

Disagree? Think you know all the answers, and that you’re an expert on how people other than yourself will react in the vicinity of a casino? Then argue with me using cold, hard, facts and studies. Don’t just make up bullshit based on hearsay and inexperienced self-righteousness. Put your unsubstantiated judgement aside. Prove to me that having a casino (or 3) in Toronto will destroy the city and surrounding neighborhoods as you know them. Maybe then you’ll have a point, but I for one, believe the Toronto is strong enough and resilient enough to responsibly enjoy casinos as an entertainment option.

If you have something intelligent to say, say it. But keep your dumb-ass comments to yourselves, haters. Don’t ruin it for the rest of us.

 
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Posted by on April 4, 2013 in Gambling Opinion

 

Near the airport, need to kill some time? Try Woodbine.

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I guess my title is self-explanatory. The only thing to add is that one of the pictures is of the Noodle Bar, just outside Willows restaurant at the Woodbine Racetrack Slots. I think it’s a great noodle bar. It might be a little pricey (something around $15 for a large bowl of noodles), but hey, you’re at the slots, and it’s a pretty good pile of noodles, tasty meats, and healthy vegetables. There are a variety of noodles to try, including Cantonese style, Vietnamese, and Pad Thai.

My point is, rather than get yourself stuck in traffic around the airport, why not go a bit early or stay a bit later in the area and drive when it makes more sense? Just a thought.

 
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Posted by on December 18, 2012 in Gambling Opinion

 

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New Casino in Toronto?

I was going to write an entry on this topic, and still might, but in the meantime, I just read an article in Toronto Life that echos my thoughts almost exactly.

http://www.torontolife.com/daily/informer/from-print-edition-informer/2012/07/13/stephen-marche-ontario-place/

  • “Viva Las Ontario Place” – by Stephen Marche – The question isn’t whether we should have a downtown casino. It’s how we can make it fabulous. An argument for embracing vice

The argument is that instead of figuring out where to tuck away the new casino mandated for Toronto by the OLG, we should be thinking of how to make it really, really great. Hear, hear. It’s a measured, persuasive piece that also covers all the opposing points.

 
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Posted by on June 12, 2012 in Gambling Opinion

 

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Fun Gambler Gets Real

I’m Dork Helmet, and this is a blog about having fun gambling. What? Having fun gambling? Is that really so hard to do? Actually, apparently it is, for a lot of people who just don’t “get” gambling. You see, I’m a responsible math-smart engineer, and a generally frugal person, so I encounter a lot of people in my circles who know nothing about gambling but are certain that it’s a stupid pastime where you throw your money away. Well, YES IT IS, but it can be HELLA FUN too!

Let’s address my initial tagline right off the bat. “A light hearted take on a potentially crippling addiction.” Okay, there’s nothing funny about those that are addicted to gambling – I’ve had a taste of that in my own family. But like alcohol, for those that can control themselves as responsible adults, gambling in reasonable doses can be fun. Lots of fun. I understand that casinos pay out only because they make a crap load of money… off you! I understand that the house ALWAYS wins in the long run. I understand that a slot machine is mathematically guaranteed to always take in more money than it pays out, and that if you play blackjack PERFECTLY you can only hope to win 49% of the time, and that in poker you are only as good as your last hand (and you’re never as good as you think you are). I get all of that. Thanks for the news flash, Mr. No Fun Smarty Pants. I only gamble what I can afford to lose, thinking of any money I wager as a cost of entertainment, not an investment, and I encourage you to do the same.

So I’d like to share my thoughts on how to have fun gambling, and a lot of that has to do with having the right information. I find that information is strangely hard to find online. Casinos have generic information that is either too biased or uninformative, and they don’t tell me what I need to know, from a “Will I have fun?” point of view.

I’d like to provide that information from the point of view of a real person (me), a recreational gambler looking to understand the entertainment value of a venue. When I go to a casino, I typically play some slot machines with my wife C, then I move onto playing poker (if they have it), while C keeps plugging away at those slots. Along the way, we appreciate the decor, sample some snacks at the bar, see a show, and usually end up stuffing ourselves at the buffet. The format of my casino notes, or reviews, will reflect this mentality of visiting a casino to have a good time. We are not hard core gamblers. But we like going to casinos.

I love Vegas, but I live in Toronto, Canada, so I’ll be focusing a lot of my casino notes in my home province of Ontario. All Slots and Casinos in Ontario are controlled by OLG (Ontario Lottery and Gaming Corporation), one of the largest public gaming agencies in the world. Ontario also runs the largest liquor control board in the world, and that kind of government control is probably going to be a topic of a future blog post. I can see the new tourism ads now: “Come to Ontario for all your drinkin’ and gamblin’ needs! Yeeeeeee haw!”

I’m also originally from Vancouver, British Columbia, and I visit there often, so you’ll see a few casino notes from BC, which is also experiencing a casino boom. And of course, I go to Vegas fairly often, so a few posts will come from there, too. And after that… the world!

I’ll also write about gambling in general, a moral and societal topic I find fascinating. I have some pointers to give on how to extract the most fun out of gambling (I have a system, it works, really!), while keeping yourself disciplined so that the pursuit of fun doesn’t turn into rueful remorse.

So those are my plans, ladies and gentlemen. I feel like I’m filling a niche. I hope you find my posts entertaining and useful, and that you keep things lively with your comments. Let the fun begin!

 
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Posted by on November 11, 2011 in Gambling Opinion, Site Announcement

 

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